One Liners That I can’t get out of my Sick Mind
1. The two most common elements in the universe are hydrogen and stupidity.
2. If at first you don’t succeed, skydiving is not for you.
3. Money can’t buy happiness but it sure makes misery easier to live with.
4. Deja Moo. The feeling that you’ve heard this […]
Top 10 Reasons Why Sleep is Better Than Sex
1. You don’t feel guilty about doing it alone.
2. No on will start rumors about how much you sleep.
3. You never have to complain in the morning about not getting any.
4. You don’t have to pay for it.
5. You don’t have to worry about falling asleep to […]
I Was Just Wondering…
If someone with multiple personalities threatens to kill himself, is it considered a hostage situation?
If a person is a vegetarian, does he eat animal crackers?
If nothing ever sticks to Teflon, how do they get Teflon to stick to the pans?
If your car is traveling at the speed of light and you turned […]
Sex toy Closes Airport
A vibrating sex toy was mistaken for a bomb. The entire Mackay Airport in Queensland was closed down for nearly an hour because of it.
The alarm was raised by cafeteria manager Lynne Bryant, whose staff was cleaning the tables when they noticed a strange humming noise coming from a rubbish bin.
Lynne Bryant […]
Fairy Tale Love
It’s funny the things that we remember from our childhood. One of the earlies things that I remember: me sitting in front of the television set watching Sleeping Beauty. Dreaming that one day I too would find my prince charming, of course he had to look just like Prince Phillipe. After getting my […]
Online gamer murdered over cyber-sword sale
A Shanghai online gamer murdered a competitor by stabbing him to death because he had sold his friends cyber-sword.
41-year-old Qiu Chengwei, stabbed competitor Zhu Caoyuan repeatedly in the chest after he was told Zhu had sold his “dragon sabre”.
A “dragon sabre” is one of the assets you can win in […]
Because You Can
by the Phoenix with the Broken Wings
Like a gun,
Use me,
To kill and steal,
And do your dirty work,
Use my ears to hear you yell,
Shut my mouth,
Fall to hell,
Fuck me
Kill my mind,
Lecture my ways,
Mould me into a flawless being,
Shape me into what you want,
Create my persona,
Make me perfect,
Pull my strings,
Control my moves,
Use me,
Control me,
Kill me,
Relive […]
Valentines Day Slogans
10. I admire your strength, I admire your spunk, But the thing I like best, is getting you drunk.
9. Our love will never become cold and hollow, Unless, one day, you refuse to swallow.
8. I bought this Valentine’s card at the store, In hopes that, later, you’d be my whore.
7. […]
A few Amazing Bird Facts
* A chicken is 75% water.
* A chicken with red earlobes will produce brown eggs, and a chicken with white earlobes will produce white eggs.
* A hawk’s vision is so good that it can see a mouse from a […]
Shall I Compare Thee, (Sonnet XVIII)
by William Shakespeare
Shall I compare thee to a Summer’s day?
Thou are more lovely and more temperate:
Rough winds do shake the darling buds of May,
And Summer’s lease hath all too short a date:
Sometime too hot the eye of heaven shines,
And often is his gold complexion dimm’d;
And every fair from […]